Episode 64: From Where You Are Now to Where You Want to Be

Welcome to the 100% Awesome Podcast with April Price. You might not know it but every result in your life is 100% because of the thoughts you think and that my friends is 100% awesome!

Hello podcast universe! Welcome to episode 64 of the 100% Awesome Podcast. I'm April Price and life for me right now is 50/50. On the fun side of the 50 50, we officially passed fifty-thousand downloads of the podcast this month and I just want to thank you for your part in that, seriously, that number is 100% awesome to me. And this month I also passed the fifty-thousand dollar mark in my business which is absolutely amazing to me, and just goes to show what can happen if you take charge of your beliefs, and commit to taking one action at a time towards your goals.

My clients right now are getting incredible results, and creating the best possible Earth life experiences that they can have, and I am so thrilled to be a part of that by showing them how if they change their thoughts, they can change anything they want in their life. And I can help you do that too, when you're ready I believe 100% that you can get all the changes you want in your life, because it happened to me, and it happens for my clients every single day. Okay, and on the other side of the 50/50 right, the less fun side, our house officially became Covid positive, which my brain thinks is pretty negative. I don't know if this is something you really want to announce to the entire world, but it is the reality that we are dealing with right now at our house. My son tested positive, and so we have kept the poor kid completely isolated in his room in attempt to not spread the virus to the rest of us, and he's almost done with his own personal quarantine, and

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I'm almost done taking food to him on a tray geared up with a mask, and goggles, and gloves, and the whole thing, right? This too shall pass, I tell myself, and my son contracting corona virus reminds me again, that we are not in charge of the circumstances. We are not in charge of the "C's" as much as we would like to be, and over the last few days I have had to remind myself again, and again, that even though I don't control the circumstances, I do control everything else. This is a lesson I never stop learning as a human, where my power is, where my real power is. My power is only in what I think what I feel, and what I do, and those things together are going to create the results I get.

My results are never determined by the circumstances, my results are created by the way I think, and feel, and act in any given set of circumstances. And the more awareness we have over that truth in our own lives, the more power we're going to get in creating our results. And this kind of leads me into what I want to talk about today. How we go about more consistently creating the results we want, and go after our dreams. And I know that this is a subject that we've talked about in the past, but I wanted to give you a few more thoughts here today to help you get from where you are now, to where you want to be. How we get from here to there, and what are the keys to keep going, rather than quitting on our way from here to there. So, I want to offer you some thoughts by way of encouragement, encouragement from whatever you want to create in your life, no matter what the current circumstances are.

I know a lot of people right now feel a bit disabled, or disempowered, by the circumstances that we find ourselves in, and so, I want to give you some thoughts to motivate you, and encourage you to keep going after what you really want. So, to set this all up I want to talk to you about why it's so hard to keep going, to keep going after our goals, right? Like they're all things we really want, so why is it so hard to get them? We are now halfway through the year, and so I have had the chance to do a lot of mid-year reflecting, and evaluating with my coach, and that has reminded me of the idea that there is always an inherent tension between our present-self, and our future-self.

In other words where we are now, where we want to be, right? And our future-self wants things, it wants to live life at a certain weight, or at a certain income. Our future- self wants to have a thriving business, or run a marathon, or write a book. Our future-self wants to have amazing relationships, and it wants to think highly of itself. But, in all these things our future-self is 100% dependent on our present-self to create these things one step at a time, because future-self can't create anything. He or she has no power to create anything, the only part of us that has power to create anything is our present-self. The problem is that present-self doesn't have the perspective of future-self, present-self can only see that tiny little bit he or she did today, didn't really make any difference. And so, we act in the present, but everything looks the same to our present-self. And so, we have this little tension inside ourselves, right? Future-self needs present-self to act, but present-self doesn't have the perspective that future self does.

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And so this leads me to the first thought that I hope will help you. I want you to leave the acting to the present, and leave evaluating the effectiveness of our work to the future. So, in the present your sole concern is always your behavior goals, the doing, the actions, what am I going to do today? And then, we need to leave the outcome goals, what's going to happen, what we're gonna create, to the future, and evaluate whether or not you've been effective in getting the outcomes you want to your future.

So, for example, I've been working in my business now for a year, and so many times along the way my present brain told me "This isn't working." But, I just kept going, I was solely focused on behavior goals. I put out a podcast every week, I made a video every Friday, I write an email every Monday, I get coached myself once a week, I dump out my brain, and I work on my beliefs every single morning. None of these things just given one at a time is going to give me the result that I have right now in my business. But, the job of present me is to act, and to continue to act in the present moment, and not evaluate whether or not it's being effective, right? Because a year later, future me can see that I have way exceeded my outcome goals, it was working all the time, but present me was too close to it in the moment to possibly be able to see that. And this applies to whatever your goals happen to be. I like to kind of reverse engineer this by asking myself "Okay where do I want to be in six months, or a year?" And then I ask myself, what I think I need to do to get there?

What are the behaviors, that daily behaviors, the weekly behaviors, that I think are going to lead to that outcome? And then, I put present me in charge of all of those actions, all of those daily behavior goals, that's its job. Not to know if it's working or not, but just to do the work, and trust the process, right? And then, you could set out like monthly, or 90-day markers where you examine your progress from future you's perspective, right? After some of those behaviors have had a chance to accumulate, future you can see if you're on track to reach your yearly goal, then you can have this kind of board meeting between future you, and present you, and discuss if we need to change the behavior goals, if we need to do anything differently day to day?

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But, remember that present you doesn't get a say on whether or not we do the behaviors every day, or whether or not the behaviors are working, because present you just doesn't know the truth. It can't see it up close right? Present you is up against the brain which always says it's too hard, and that we're too tired, and then it's not going to make a difference. And that's why present you doesn't get a vote, present you doesn't get to make the ultimate decisions, present you just gets to act. When ever present me starts calling the shots, I know I'm in trouble, because it never wants to act, and it always has a good reason why it shouldn't. So, this is a quick example, I write my podcast outline on Mondays, and then I record them on Tuesday mornings. And every Monday, present me has a really good reason about why we shouldn't, right? It says, "Hey we don't have any good ideas. We don't know what to say, it's been a long day we'll do it tomorrow." And this is why don't ever let present me call the shots.

Present me makes terrible decisions, and that's why present me is just in charge of the action. It's Monday, and that means present me has a behavior to perform, we write the outline Then, it's Tuesday morning, we record, and we edit, but I take the decisions out of present me's hands, because it never thinks it's a good idea to get to work, when it is time to work. And then, future me is very very grateful that this is the setup, because future me now has 64 podcast episodes and over fifty-thousand downloads. This system works, put present you in charge of the action, and future you in charge of the outcomes.

Okay, the next idea I have for you is the idea that it should be hard. Awesome, right? Okay, going after our goals, and becoming a new person, and creating a new life, a new version of us requires effort, and when it's hard it means in fact that you're doing it right. So, recently my son and I have started a new exercise program, and it is very very challenging for us, right? We are putting our muscles under more tension for longer amounts of time than we ever have before. We're changing up the way that we're concentrating on certain muscle groups. We're using heavier weights, right? And it's been really tough, like every morning we text each other like, the fire emoji or that like skeleton death emoji, so that we can know that we are not suffering alone, right? Anyway, as part of this I have been trying to learn more about the muscle groups, and how to target specific muscles in specific ways, and how to understand what the muscles are supposed to be doing, which ones are supposed to be firing when during the exercise, and trying not to get hurt while I'm doing all of this.

And so, my son told me, "Hey you gotta watch this guy on YouTube. He has some great videos that talk about how to build muscle groups, and train your muscles in really effective ways." And so, I was watching a few of these videos, his name is Ryan Hamastan, anyway, he has these videos, and I was watching the ones on leg muscles, right? Quads, hamstrings, glutes, anyway on a couple of the videos he would do the exercise as prescribed, and he'd run through the set, and then he would look at the camera just like sweating, and he would say, "That was awful."

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He was just sweaty, and straining, and taxing his muscles, and putting in so much effort, and when he'd finished his set, and put down the weight he'd just be like, "That was awful." After, I heard him say this a few times it really started to change things for me. And not only did I find this phrase "that was awful" oddly comforting, I also found it very instructive, because when I heard Ryan Hamastan say, "that it was awful" for me it was powerful, and helped me create the mindset that I needed to be able to do these difficult workouts.

It was the thought "that is awful" and that's okay, and maybe even more than that, that it's awful and it's supposed to be. I'm doing it right, it's supposed to be awful if you're doing it right. Up until that point I think I was always trying to avoid the awful, I was trying to get through the sets with the least amount of discomfort possible. I was trying to build my muscles, and hoping that it wouldn't hurt too bad, and you can see right away the flaws in this kind of thinking, because muscles grow when they are put under stress. When they are damaged, and they tear, and the time that a muscle spends under tension is what tells the body that the muscle needs to change, and needs to grow. And if there is no awful, then there's no change, and the body just stays the same. But, when I require more of my muscles, and it's awful, then I'm going to make more progress towards my goal. Not only that, but I kind of thought that there was something wrong with me if it was awful, right? Like I was too weak, or I was not built for this, I was not an athlete, I didn't have what it takes. But, here was this huge muscled guy thinking that it was awful, and so that meant well like if he thinks it's awful, it's totally fine, and there's nothing wrong with me.

If I think it's hard, if I think it's awful, and I think sometimes we think that if it's hard to reach our goals that something is wrong that we're doing it wrong somehow, that it's easy for other people, and that's just not true. And, big muscled Ryan almost in saying that it was awful, hearing this just help me lean into my discomfort, and acknowledge it and not need to change it and know that nothing had gone wrong for me because it was extremely uncomfortable and that if I wanted to grow I needed it to be extremely uncomfortable and a little bit awful.

I understood that it was awful and it was supposed to be. Now, this doesn't mean that we have to hate it along the way, we don't hate that it's awful, because it's not negative. That it's awful like, it's awful, and that's awesome. That means that whatever goals we have we can work toward them, and it can take enormous effort and strain, it can take all that we've got every single day, and we can love doing it. We can love the hurt, we can love the struggle, so I'm hoping that that thought will help you not to see the world more negatively like everything's awful, right? But, to stop resisting the parts that are supposed to tax you, and grow you, and be challenging to allow for the discomfort, and get to work anyway, because you want the growth that comes from the discomfort. Whatever you are facing, when you get to the awful parts it's totally okay to acknowledge it, and not have to talk yourself out of it. You do the awful parts, because you're awesome. You do the awful parts, because you know that ultimately it's going to strengthen all those parts that are staggering under the weight right now.

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And ultimately it will be for your good if it's awful, maybe it's supposed to be, and not only is it okay, but maybe in fact it's what you want, and you can just embrace it, because what we're really after with any goal is growth, personal growth. And growth happens when you spend time under tension. When we put ourselves, right our human brain, and our human body, under tension for any length of time we are learning to overcome that human part of us that would like to avoid discomfort, and avoid tension. We're trying to overcome that part of us with our higher self, and that's going to require discomfort. So, I heard this quote the other day that "entrepreneurship is a personal growth engine, disguised as a business pursuit." But, this is true of any goal, whatever our goal is, whatever we want to achieve it's all just a personal growth engine disguised as something else. A personal growth engine disguised as a health goal, or a financial goal, or some other pursuit, but the point is that if it requires awful amounts of effort, it's likely that you are doing it right. And you can love it all along the awful way for what that time under tension is creating inside of you.

Okay, the next thought I have to offer you if you find yourself not taking action towards your goals, and moving from here to there is the idea that you are making the movement or the goal, mean too much. You are putting way too much pressure on the accomplishment of the goal, because of what you will make it mean when you get there, when you accomplish the goal. And this pressure is a result of believing that achieving our goals will somehow make us whole, and complete, and that we're going to matter somehow. That we're going to matter enough finally. And I know that I talk about this a lot, but our lack, and our self-doubt of our own worthiness is such a problem for most of us, that it bears repeating and I want you to hear it one more time, right? And really, I want you to hear it as many times as it takes. You already matter! Nothing you do, or don't do, will ever make you matter more, or make your life matter more. You cannot ever matter more than you do right now, just by being born just by existing as you are, you matter as much as you can.

And when we make achieving our goals mean that we're going to matter, or that we can feel good about ourselves, then we often end up sabotaging ourselves. I think for two reasons, one, we make it means so much that the goal becomes very very heavy and stressful. And two as we get closer, and closer to the goal, and we suddenly realize "Hey I don't feel any better about myself. I still don't feel like I matter, right?" We suddenly realize this isn't going to work, achieving this thing isn't going to work to make us feel better, or feel complete, and so then we end up sabotaging ourselves or giving up before we get there. This feeling of not mattering, or not being enough in some way is part of our experience of Earth life. I don't think it's an insecurity that will ever fully go away, until we die, and return to the presence of the Father of us all. I think it is part of being separated from Him, and His love, and feeling like orphans here on Earth. And I tell you that not to discourage you, but to help you see that it's never going to be better there than here, you're not going to feel better about yourself there than here.

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Achieving the goal doesn't make this insecurity go away. That doesn't magically get better when you arrive somewhere else, which I hope will be a relief to you in many ways, because it means that you're never pursuing your goal to become something or to matter in some way. You're just going after your goal, because you want to, which takes so much of the pressure off. You're just going after your goal because you can, which I hope will make it fun for you. And I know that kind of sounds like the opposite of awful, which I had just gotten done talking about, but it can be fun to see how far you can push yourself in the awful, just for the joy of it, just to see what's possible. And what I'm saying is, you already matter, you just don't know it. And that not knowing will probably continue throughout your earth life experience. That not knowing won't change when you achieve goals, but it is incredibly freeing, and empowering to also know that you don't have to chase goals to try to make that not knowing go away.

So, just hear me, you don't have to get somewhere else or be somebody else to matter. You don't have to achieve something to matter, you already matter. And it might not feel like it, but that's not because it's not true, it's just because that is the human experience. And you could just let it be, and then just remind yourself of that truth whenever you forget it.

The next thing I want to give you as you continue to pursue your dreams, is the idea that things are going to go wrong, and not only is that okay, but the way things go wrong is the way that you get there. Now, I know that sounds kind of confusing but let me see if I can explain. So, while I was at the beach a couple of weeks ago I read a really good book by Colin O. Brady, it's called "The Impossible First," and if you want to learn from a firsthand account of how to keep going after your goals in the face of incredible impossible odds, I just can't recommend this book enough. And it's like so well-written, and so engaging, and it just like it's such a really good example of overcoming fear in your own mind, in order to achieve what you want. Anyway, in the book Colin O. Brady talked about this experience he had when he was trying to do the Explorer's Grand Slam, which involves hiking to both the North Pole, and the South Pole, and doing all of the seven summits, which are the highest peaks on every continent in the world.

Anyway, as Colin was completing the six of the seven summits he was on Mount Everest, and on the day that he was supposed summit, a storm rolled in and they weren't able to climb to the summit. And, not only did that mean that he couldn't summit that day, but Camp four, where he was, is so high up that they couldn't stay up there and wait it out. Because the human body literally starts dying at that altitude, it's consuming itself just to stay alive. And so they had to head back down the mountain, pass Camp three, all the way to Camp Two, in order to wait to see if this storm would clear. He was so disappointed about this, he'd already done the North Pole, the South Pole, and five other peaks, right? And now, this storm is stopping him. But his Sherpa told him, "Some things we cannot choose. There will be other days in this life to climb." Right now, for Colin O. Brady, it didn't feel like that, right? He would have to start the entire Explorer's Grand Slam over again if he missed this window. It felt like there weren't other days, and he felt like everything had gone wrong. But, as his guide said, "Some things we cannot choose."

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Okay, now I'm going to read an excerpt that is his own words. He said "Passang Bhote’s stoic calm eluded me. I had been climbing for 120 days by that moment, through four extraordinary, and intense months of physical effort in trying to break the world record for the Explorers Grand Slam. I was thinned out, exhausted, and sleep deprived, after climbing the tallest peaks in Antarctica, South America, Africa, Oceana, and Europe. And crossing that last degree to the North and South poles, just getting here to twenty- six thousand feet on the mountain higher than I'd ever been in my life had required me to dig deeply into every reserve of strength, and determination I could muster. And now, on the second to last of the project's Seven Summits, just three thousand feet below the highest point in the world, with only Denali in Alaska left to climb after that it was all unraveling." And I want you to imagine how that felt. Here's the thing, sometimes setbacks happen for all of us, right, no matter what goal we're working on, no matter what goal, we're working on some things we cannot choose.

But what we do when we come to a setback, or an obstacle is what matters. There's another moment of choice there, not avoiding the obstacle altogether, but adapting to them. So, for Colin O. Brady, he said that for much of his life he resisted thinking about the "what if's or the worst case scenarios," right? He felt like thinking about what could go wrong made those things kind of happen, right? It made them sort of inevitable, and so he didn't like doing it. But, his wife, who handled all of the logistics of his climbs, and his adventures, believed that you should anticipate, and plan for every scenario, right? Every obstacle, and then you can be ready with a new plan, and a new adaptation when things go wrong, and in this case it meant that O. Brady had to climb back down to Camp two. But then he got a small window four days later, it meant that then he had to climb up and down the summit of Everest very quickly, get straight on a helicopter out of Katmandu, to get to Alaska to climb Denali, and he had to climb Denali in three days, instead of the three weeks he had planned. But he kept thinking this thought, he kept thinking "Things are still in motion."

He said his wife always believed that no matter what, no matter the obstacles, things are always in motion. And it's just about adjusting, and adapting, because every setback then creates a whole new set of options, and things are always in motion. And one of my coaches, Jody Moore, calls this, "going downstream." And instead of swimming upstream all the time, and thinking you're supposed to be somewhere else in the river we can accept that we're exactly where we're supposed to be, and use what is now becoming available to you downstream.

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In other words, like when setbacks happen you are already downstream of them, right? For example, when the storm hit on Everest, Colin O. Brady was already downstream of his original plan, and so he can give up, and push against that reality, or he can believe that things are still in motion. He can still make it work downstream, instead of trying to claw our way back to where we think we're supposed to be. We can accept where we are and use everything downstream of us to create what we want anyway to achieve the goal anyway. This means that our goals can stay the same regardless of the obstacles, we can just be loose and adaptable about the way that we get there. We can even believe that when things go wrong, they were supposed to go wrong in that way. And that the new way you find, is the way that you were always going to get there. If you believe in the inevitability of the goal, the way you get there lose its importance altogether. Allow for the setback, allow for the obstacles, and clinging to the inevitability of the goal. No matter what. I love that thought, "Things are always in motion." Just because it didn't go the way I planned or thought they would, "Things are still in motion," and I think that thought applies to every single area of our life. Things are always in motion.

Okay, finally, I just want to offer you the idea that you don't have to do it on your own. When we go from here to there, and set out to accomplish things we are asking ourselves to become new versions of ourselves, which is awesome, except that the old version of us fights tooth and nail to stay. Her brain doesn't want to give up the status quo in the way that we've always done things, and it doesn't like to change, it fights for things to stay the same. Which is why I think coaching is so valuable, my coaches show me where it's just my old-self, my own brain, and its old fears, and insecurities, fighting for my current life, fighting for the current version of me, and my current limitations. My coaches call me out on all the tiny subtle, nearly invisible ways that I quit on myself, or give into my excuses, and and try to stay the same.

They show me where choosing the path of courage, and change is the way to get what I really want. And they believe in my ability to get the change I want, when my fear is just raging. I think what gets in the way of this, is we think that we should know how to do it on our own. But, I don't see why? We know how to do this version of us, we know how to do the current version, if we knew how to do another version, we would be doing that. We know how to do this, and it doesn't mean you're failing to ask for help. To be able to do it differently it means you're resourceful. It means you believe in yourself. It means you get what you're up against, you're up against yourself. Which means that like yourself knows exactly how to undermine yourself in the change, and an outside source shows you so clearly where your own brain is just doing the sabotage in order to remain the same. And for me, that outside source, my coaches, have allowed me to achieve things that I never thought were possible. Last year at this time you guys I had made five hundred dollars in my business, and half of that was from my sister who was just being kind to me. So, think about that.

Five hundred dollars, to fifty-five thousand dollars and I think that was possible because I hired coaches to expose all my fears, and my limiting beliefs to the light of day so that I could stop making excuses and get to work. So, I was recently interviewed on one of my coaches podcasts, and to prep for it I went back and looked at all my notes, and thought downloads from our coaching last fall. And I was just so full of fear, and self-doubt, and shame, like every other page were these huge notes, and capital letters FEEL YOUR FEELINGS APRIL. Your number one job is to believe you can help people. And I could see like all the angst, and anxiety, and terror in the words, and the models, and even in my penmanship, right? And it just brought it all right back for me.

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I remember being there and the most amazing thing is now I am somewhere else, now I am here. I passed through there, and I came out on the other side into this other version of me, a version with a busy, working coaching practice, that I love. And it doesn't mean that I don't still have fear, and anxiety, but it means that now I have them, and I also have a coaching business, right? It means I have them, and I'm also reaching my goals, and this is true in every area of my life.

My weight, my money, my spirituality, my relationships, you can get what you want, you really can. You can go from here to there, and of course you can do it on your own. But I think you can do it faster, and easier, and more successfully with a coach by your side. We all have drama in our head, story about why we can't, why it's not for us, why it's too scary, but coaches don't have the extra drama in their head about us. They just believe in us, and they know we can have what we want. And I love having someone in my life that knows that, even when I don't.

Okay, that's what I have for you today. There is a way from here to there, from where you are now, to where you want to be. Put yourself to work in the present, leave the evaluation to the future. Embrace the awful, love the awful, don't make your goals mean so much, you already matter. Remember that things are always in motion, and you can use everything downstream of where you are now to make your goals happen, and you don't have to do it alone. I want you to try these things in your own life, all of these tools can be so powerful in helping you get from where you are now, to where you want to be.

And that my friends is 100% awesome!

I love you for listening and I'll see you next week!

Thanks so much for joining me on the podcast today. If you want to take the things that I've talked about and apply them to your life sign up for a free coaching session at aprilpricecoaching.com This is where the real magic happens and your life starts to change forever believing your life is 100% Awesome is totally available to every one of us. And as your coach. I'll show you exactly how to do that so that you can truly love your Earth life experience the way things are is not the way things have to stay.

And that my friends is 100% Awesome