When my children were babies, one of the first things they learned was how to ask for more. I taught them to tap their fists together to sign the word “more.” And even before they could talk, they learned that there was a way to request more of what they wanted.
I wonder when it got hard to ask for more. Or when it got hard to believe that we could have more. I wonder when we decided that “more” might be possible for other people, but it wasn’t really for people like us and maybe we shouldn’t even want it anyway.
I want to give you permission to want more.
And not only want more, but get more.
You can be totally grateful and love everything you have and still want more. And it’s not wrong. It is how God functions after all. He is full of love and appreciation and gratitude and humility, and there is no end to his creation.
The first step is to believe that you can get more from your life. Your brain wants you to think that you...
Our brains create tens of thousands of thoughts every single day and sometimes it can feel overwhelming to think that we have to be aware of, redirect, and change all these thoughts to get the life we want.
Luckily, this isn’t true. We don’t have to change all our thoughts to get what we want. We only have to change one. Changing even one thought can have a huge impact on your life. In today’s video, I’ll show you how really changing your life is only one thought away.
What one thought do you want to change?
Cause you get to!
My phone does this thing where at the end of the week it tells me how much time I spent looking at it. Every Sunday it gives me a weekly report that calculates exactly how many minutes and hours from my week were used on my phone and it even compares that amount to my phone usage the week before.
I’m always surprised by the way those minutes add up!
But last Sunday when this little report popped up, it made me think about the way I spend my time, and specifically, what I spend my time thinking.
What if I could get a report from my brain about how much time I spent in belief, exactly how many minutes of my week I actively spent believing in my current goals and dreams. What if it could tell me how much time I spent not believing and how much time I used up in self-doubt or questioning if what I want is even possible.
If your brain could produce a report, what thoughts would it show you spend the majority of your time thinking?
If we want to believe something, we have to spend...
If you could feel more of any emotion this month, what would it be?
What would you like to feel more of any time you wanted?
We sometimes wait for life to present the feelings we want TO us. But in this video, I’ll show you how we can actually choose to feel the emotions we want more often and this is one of the most powerful skills we can learn.
The other day my daughter called me in tears. Something had gone wrong on a project she had been working on and it hadn’t turned out the way she wanted. She sobbed, “What is the purpose of my life?”
Now, of course, her brain was being dramatic. (This is what brains do. They like to equate failure with death every chance they get.) But I also thought it was interesting that her brain had made a connection between production and purpose.
A lot of us do this. We think the things we do, the things we produce, the things we accomplish give our lives purpose and meaning.
But think about how exhausting this is. When we think what we do gives our lives meaning, we have to constantly justify our existence by doing. This also leads to ranking ourselves and comparing what we do to what other people do. And we have to always be doing more and accomplishing more to feel okay.
We even say ridiculous things like, “Find your purpose.” And we put it on mugs...
Without even realizing it or intending it, we all set up a lot of expectations for the people we love. These thoughts about the way they should be or what they should do can get in the way of loving them.
But, the thing keeping us from love isn’t what they do.
The thing keeping us from love is always our expectation of how they’re supposed to do it.
Today I’m sharing a thought that will help you give up your expectations of the people you love and show you that how much love you feel is always up to you!
I used to think I was fundamentally different than the people I admired.
I used to think they had something I didn’t. Or that maybe they just didn’t have the fear and shame and self-doubt that I did.
I used to think that either by nature or nurture, they were made different than me.
But now I know that’s not true.
Because all the people I admire have brains.
Which means that all the people I admire have the same voices of fear and doubt and confusion and overwhelm incessantly working against them. They have brains that whine at the work, cringe at the risks, fear criticism and failure, and offer mountains of excuses.
They have just learned not to listen to them.
There is hearing your brain. And then there is heeding your brain.
And while all brains are going to protest, nothing says you have to take any of it seriously.
My brain still has all of the misgivings and the doubts and the fears it always did.
I just finally learned that none of them matter.
Do you ever worry that your goals might be bad? Or somehow out of alignment with the real purpose of your life? Do you sometimes worry that your goal might get your priorities out of whack? Or think that dreaming big is unnecessary or worse…maybe even immoral?
I have done some wrestling with these thoughts and questions recently and I want to share a thought that changed the way I see my goals—and just might change the world, as well.
Did you know you get to believe whatever you want?
I mean, really.
Whatever. You. Want.
The other day my coach posted a picture of herself on Instagram wearing a yellow sweater. She wrote, “I told myself for YEARS that I didn’t look good in yellow. Then I decided I didn’t want to believe that anymore.”
And it reminded me that for years I believed my ankles were too thick to wear shoes with straps around the ankles, or booties that stopped at the ankle. That would draw people’s eyes to my horrifically thick and hopelessly flawed ankles!
But I recently bought two pairs of booties that I love and decided that I don’t have to think that anymore.
It was all just made up anyway.
Every thought is made up.
Even the dumb ones.
Even the little ones.
Even the ones that you got when you were sixteen.
Even the ones that someone you loved or some beauty expert in a magazine told you.
They’re all made up.
When we make a decision, we are choosing one thing and eliminating the other options. This feels scary because we’re afraid that if we make the wrong decision, we might impact our happiness and then we’ll have regret.
But regret is not created by whether you made the right decision or the wrong decision. Regret is created by our thoughts. It is created by what we think after we make the decision. Whatever we feel about a decision— regret or peace, anxiety or confidence—it is never created by the decision itself.
On this episode I’ll teach you how to make powerful decisions without regret and show you how to replace fear with confidence no matter how big or small the decision is.