A lot of us think we feel bad about ourselves for a “good reason.”
We believe that we keep thinking we’re not good enough
...because of something that happened in our childhood.
...or because our spouse criticized us.
…or because we messed up or did it wrong or failed at something.
…or because people at church judged us.
We think there is a REASON that we believe there is something wrong with us.
But you believe you aren’t good enough because this is what every human thinks.
It is the "factory setting" of human brains. No matter how successful we are, no matter how attractive we are, no matter how our parents or our spouse treat us, no matter who approves of us or doesn’t, no matter what we accomplish or don’t…our brain is ALWAYS going to think there is something wrong with us and we aren’t enough.
And I know that sounds like bad news, but what if it’s not? What if it means you can STOP worrying...
Sometimes our brain gets a bad rap.
Once we figure out that our thoughts are the source of all our problems, we sometimes blame everything on our brains and think it would be easier if they were different.
But our brain is just doing its job. Beautifully, by the way!
And the more we can appreciate our brain's job, the less frustrated we will be.
I hope this helps!
P.S. Do you have a question that you'd love me to answer on the podcast? You can submit your question by clicking here.
We spent last weekend in St. Louis. And while most of the people there were wearing shorts and sleeveless shirts, I am from Phoenix. And I was cold.
I wore a jacket everywhere we went. And I turned on the seat warmer whenever we were in the car.
I love the seat warmer feature. Even if I am the slightest bit chilly, I turn it on. Just a couple of degrees off my ideal temperature and I reach for the seat warmer. I love being that comfortable.
In many ways, most of us are getting worse and worse at being uncomfortable. Humans are constantly solving for discomfort and our endless ingenuity is making life easier and easier. And really, that’s kind of awesome.
But sometimes our comfortable lives make us forget that when it comes to our goals, discomfort is required and we are a little surprised by the pain.
We want to lose weight without changing our diet or “having to think about it.” We want to share our work without being rejected or feeling inadequate and...
To love ANYTHING in your life, you only have to do ONE thing.
Also, I am doing a podcast in a couple of weeks where I'm answering listener questions. If you want to ask me a question you can reply to this email, or you can click here to record a message and hear your voice on the podcast!
On Saturday, on the way home from the gym, David said, “Maybe you could coach me a little. There’s something bothering me and I know it shouldn’t, but it does.”
He went on to share some thoughts and feelings he was having about other people, and then he said, “I know I’m judging them and it’s terrible.”
David thinks what a lot of us think: that if we think "bad thoughts" and feel "bad feelings," then we are bad. And so as he judges others, he judges himself a whole lot more.
And that's always what keeps us stuck.
Because when we judge ourselves for what we are thinking, then we stuff the thoughts away and they stay hidden away in our brain, making us feel bad.
You are supposed to have thoughts that create negative emotion for you—even negative emotions like judgment and jealousy and defensiveness and anger. You are supposed to be having thoughts and you are supposed to be having all the emotions they create....
First, I wanted to let you know that in a couple of weeks I'm doing a podcast episode answering your questions. If you want to ask me a question, you can leave a message by clicking here. You might even get to hear yourself on the podcast! It's gonna be awesome!
For today's video, I wanted to give you a tool that might help you if you ever have a hard time changing your thoughts.
Because even though we all understand that our thoughts are creating our feelings, and we all want to feel better, it can still seem difficult to change our thoughts.
I hope this helps!
On Friday night, someone in our neighborhood let off a loud firecracker. The sound boomed through the house and our dog, Auggie, nearly lost his mind.
He started barking like crazy, running around in circles and scratching at the door, begging to be let out. He wanted to personally assess the magnitude of danger we were in, confront it head on, and do what he could to protect us.
My daughter tried to pick him up to calm him down and it just made things worse. He started scrabbling around in her arms trying to get free, barking even more, and bucking desperately against her hold.
It took him a long time to calm down.
Because Auggie thinks he has a job to do. Auggie thinks his job is to protect the rest of his pack. He can hear and see better than the rest of us and he’s built to notify us of danger—like neighbors having parties, or birds landing in our yard, or nefarious delivery people daring to approach the door.
He doesn’t know that we’re not in actual...
Do you ever wonder why you do things that you wish you wouldn't do?
Do you ever wonder why you don't do the things you think you should?
Today I want to show you that we always have a good reason for the way we act. And the more curious we can get about that reason, the more power we have to change what we're doing.
Whether you want to stop doing something or start doing something, I think this video will help.
P.S. I love knowing that the way things are and the way I am, is not the way things have to stay. I have unlimited power to change and so do you!
I used to be addicted to the Home Shopping Network.
Seriously. I couldn't sleep without it.
At the time, I was over forty years old, overweight, deeply in debt, and living in a rented house. Every night I went to bed next to my husband that I resented for not loving me or helping me enough. And while he and our children slept, I lay awake, worrying about how to pay the bills, adding up all the ways I was failing, and anticipating all the terrible things that might go wrong.
As miserable and terrified as I was, I couldn’t even kneel down and pray for help because I knew God was disappointed in me. I imagined him up there shaking his head, “You did this to yourself, April. You did it all wrong and I can’t help you now.”
Night after night, I lay there wishing everything was different.
The only relief I had from hating myself and hating my life, was the Home Shopping Network. I kept it on all night—listening to the sparkly hosts talk in luxurious,...
Believing new things seems complicated. Our brain tells us it's hard, or even impossible.
But it's actually WAY easier than you think.
Today I'm sharing the fastest way to believe new things about yourself. I hope it helps!
P.S. Did you know you get to believe whatever you want? WHATEVER you want! Sign up for a free coaching consultation and I'll show you how.